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Title: "If I could be a superhero"
Fandom: Horrible Histories
Characters: Rattus Rattus, Dave Lamb (principal), Charles II, Sotherby, Lady Posh, Alexander the Great, Hephaestion, Blenkinsop, Maltravers (secondary)
Genre: Adventure
Rating: PG
Beta: None
Summary: An accident in the time-sewers leads to people throughout history getting superpowers, and it's up to Dave Lamb and Rattus Rattus to get them back ...

A/N: An awesome prompt on [livejournal.com profile] hhanon called for an accident in the time sewers causing everyone to have superpowers, and hilarity ensuing, and I went to write a nice short fill where this would happen. Somehow, it turned into over 11,000 words of adventuring fic where Rattus and Dave travel through history being semi-competent heroes, causing havoc and mayhem wherever they went. Nope, I've no idea either xD Thankyou anon, for posting such a BRILLIANT prompt!

A/N 2: All parts will be linked through at the end of each chapter :)

Disclaimer: Don't own, never will own!


Rumbling filled the air, and Rattus looked at the clock on the wall.

"We're not due to visit any historical eras," he said, hopping down off the table and scurrying over to the view-screen leading to the time-sewers.

Clambering up the steps he had made from some chairs and some maths books (well, not like he was going to use them, he thought, a cackle escaping his mouth), he wiped away the grime and stared into the time-sewers.

"Hmmmmm ..."

Through the dusty screen (well, not like he was going to be dusting. He was a rat after all), he saw various flashes of light, and shrugged.

"What on earth's going on?"

The view-screen turned black again, and Rattus waited a moment.

"Huh - guess it's just playing sillies!"

Taking a run-up, he leapt from the chairs to the table, and settled back down to eat his dinner.

He grabbed some of the bacon and shoved it in his mouth, sighing happily.

"Mmmmph that'sh goo bacon," he said through a mouthful of food, "jush ripe enough for eashing."

As he swallowed, there was a crash of thunder.

The room shook, and Rattus was flung on the floor. Sirens were going off, one of the lights was hanging from its wires, and his easy steps up to the view-screen had collapsed.

"What the hell was that!"

Rattus pulled himself up off the floor, picking some of the bacon that had fallen on him out of his fur.

He scurried over to the pile of rubbish that had been his steps, shoving the bacon in his mouth on the way.

Clambering up, he hauled himself onto the small sill by the screen, and looked through into the time-sewers.

He gulped.

"I don't think they should be glowing ..." he said, and as he did so, there was a flash of light, and the glow disappeared.

The printer screeched, a realm of paper erupting from it with a clatter and a belch of smoke.

He jumped down, running over as fast as he could.

Paper was still streaming from the printer, starting to head onto the floor, and Rattus sat on one of the pieces, looking at what had happened.

Reading with his tail running along under the words, he got to the end, and his mouth dropped open.

"No, that can't -"

He ran onto another piece of paper, reading it quickly.

"No, no no no no no!"

He read another, then another, and as the printer finally finished printing, the sirens cut off, and all that could be heard was the sound of paper landing all over the room.

Rattus shuffled on the spot, looking at the bolded, underlines, capital letters on the paper he was currently sitting on.

WARNING: UNEXPECTED RELEASE OF SUPER-POWERS TO THE STUART ERA, THE CELTIC ERA, THE ROMAN ERA, THE GEORGIAN ERA, THE VICTORIAN ERA, THE FIRST WORLD WAR, THE SECOND WORLD WAR, THE MEDIEVAL ERA, THE FRENCH ...

The rest of the historical eras were covered by Rattus' bottom, and on the other sheets, they gave more and more descriptions of what was happening where, and more importantly, when.

Rattus gulped.

"Dave is going to kill me!"
 
-x-x-x-x-
 
To say that Dave wasn't pleased would be like saying that the eruption of Vesuvius was a little hiccup.

He stood in the middle of the control room, hand pinching the top of his nose to try and stave off the impending headache.

He opened his mouth to speak, and the light which had been hanging on by a single wire gave up and crashed to the ground.

As the clatter faded away, Rattus poked his nose out from under his shelter of Pythagoras' Theorem.

"...Dave?"

Dave held his hand up, and Rattus clamped his paws over his mouth.

"How, did this happen?" he eventually asked, and Rattus started speaking.

"Mmmmph mmmph mhhpph -"

"Rattus ..." said Dave in a warning tone, and Rattus removed his paws and started playing with his tail.

"I've no idea Dave! I was quietly minding my own business -"

"Plotting to try and get the BBC to bring in a badger -"

"Well, yes, but I honestly didn't touch anything! The time-sewer just rumbled, crashed about and then glowed. And then, well," he gestured round the room as far as his tiny limbs could stretch, "that happened."

Dave picked up one of the pieces of paper, reading it silently.

After a moment, he crumpled it in his hands, taking a deep breath.

"Right. So practically every era in history has now got someone, or several someones, with superpowers. Brilliant."

He sat down, and rubbed his eyes.

"And now we have to sort it out."

Rattus shuffled closer on the desk. Maybe Dave wasn't going to string him up.

"We could try reversing the time-sewer? It worked with the zombies didn't it?"

Dave looked at him.

"It only worked with the zombies because they were still in the time-sewers. Reversing them now would just cause the universe to implode."

"That's bad isn't it."

Dave sighed.

"Yes Rattus, very bad. Get the manual - there might be something in there to solve this."
Rattus didn't move.

Dave looked at him.

"Rattus?"

Rattus blinked.

"We have a manual?"

Dave looked like he was trying very hard not to wring Rattus' neck. When he spoke, it was with a great deal of difficulty.

"Yes, Rattus, we have a manual. It's why we haven't broken the universe yet."

"I thought that was luck?"

"MANUAL - third shelf from the bottom."

Rattus shrugged and leapt off the table, hurrying over to the shelving which was still standing - albeit lopsided.

Hauling himself up onto the shelf, Rattus looked along, and saw a big blue folder with the word "Manual" scrawled in felt-tip.

"Got it!"

Dave sighed again, but this one sounded more hopeful.

"Bring it over Rattus."

Rattus pushed it off the shelf, and came back over, chattering as he pushed the manual across the floor.

"I've been here for years and I never knew we had a manual, though as Mum used to say, every cloud has a silver lining! Well, she would have said it, if she hadn't had taken a dive into the time-sewer. Think she's in Ancient Rome at the moment, well, I say Ancient -"

"Rattus, much as I am enjoy hearing your life story, just hurry up!"

"Yes Dave! Here we are!"

Rattus clambered back up on the table and Dave picked up the manual, starting to leaf through it.

A few minutes later, he sighed with relief.

"Thank God, there's a way to fix this!"

"Mmmph mppph mmmmhf - yes!" said Rattus, swallowing the last of the bacon and wiping his mouth with his paw, "what is it?"

"All we have to do, is find the person who's gained the superhero powers, get their permission to get them back, and use the ..." Dave squinted at the page, "de-powerifier to get things back to normal!"

"Brilliant!"

"De-powerifier is a useless name though," said Rattus after a moment, "you think that whoever invented it could have thought of a better name."

Dave shrugged.

"Apparently it was Alfred Nobel. But," he continued, "this can get sorted. The printer's given us a list of people with the powers, we can still go in and out of the time-sewers and get to the various eras, and it'll be fiiiine."

Rattus clapped.

"Yay! So who's first? And where is the de-powerifier?"

"Should be in the trunk," Dave said absent-mindedly, shuffling through the printouts, "first person is ..."

He fell silent.

Rattus looked at him.

"Who is it?"

Dave looked up at the ceiling, a groan leaving his lips.

"Charles the Second."

A moment later, his head hit the table with a thump.

"I should have never got out of bed today ..." he muttered.
 
-x-x-x-x-
 
An hour later, Dave and Rattus stood at the entrance to the time-sewer.

"Map?"

"Check!"

"De-powerifier?"

"Check!"

"The power-locaterifier?"

"Nobel’s really bad at names; can we call it something else?"

"Rattus ..."

"Check!"

Dave picked the bag off the floor and slung it on his shoulders.

"Right. So it's the first left, the second right, and three ladders to the Stuart era, and then another left to Charles II. Let's go Rattus."

Rattus squeaked and looked at Dave.

"I'm coming?"

Dave looked at him.

"If I leave you alone in here, you might do something even worse, so yes, you're coming with me."

"Well you'll need to give me a lift then."

"What? I - oh for goodness sake, just get in the bag, we're wasting time."

Dave lowered the bag and Rattus climbed onto it - only to sit on Dave's shoulder once he put the bag on his back.

"Great, I'm going to smell of rat," Dave muttered, and he hauled open the door.

The smell of sludge and history wafted through the room, and the sounds of battles and screeching started to echo through as well.

Dave hauled himself up into the tunnel, holding onto the bar with one hand.

Rattus dug his claws into his shoulder, and Dave grimaced.

"Right - off we go."

He let go, and as they fell down the slide, Rattus' "Geronimo!!!!" echoed back up the slide.
 
-x-x-x-x-

Part 2: Dave and Rattus meet Charles II ...

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