"The Trials of one James Tiberius Kirk" 3/5?

[amine_eyes]

Title: "The Trials of one James Tiberius Kirk - (Or, Five times he tried to have sex with Bones and failed miserably)"
Pairing: Kirk / McCoy
Rating: NC-17
Summary: All Jim wants is fantastic sex with Bones, is that so much to ask?
Beta: the wonderful sororexitium  :D
A/N: This is set in the same magical 'verse as "I'm so awesome!", "Had a good day Captain?" and "Work and relationships do NOT mix!" - namely, Admiral Sellick!Verse :D (God, I thought up a name for it xD)
Disclaimer: Do not own, yadda yadda etc etc

Onward to Part 3!

Previous Part: Dinner, bourbon, what could go wrong?

 

Jim sniggered as he walked through Starfleet Medical, waving cheerily at Admiral Sellick who was laughing uproariously at the receptionist’s new joke – causing nearby students and workers to cover their ears against the volume – heading out the door into the bright sunshine. As Jim made his way across the quad, he wondered how exactly he was going to distract Bones from killing him for his actions earlier in the day. Well, Jim reasoned to himself as he waved at Gaila and Ms I-don’t-need-a-first-name-‘cos-I’m-too-special Uhura, it’s not like Bones actually stopped me from giving him the blowjob, and Admiral Sellick did take it very well. Though that’s probably because he’s just won the bet with Captain Pike about which one of them was going to catch us together first.

He made his way across campus in the sunshine, whistling happily to himself as he wandered through the crowds of Starfleet personnel, counting off the good things that had happened this week. Not only did he find out where Bones’ sensitive spot was, he passed his Command tutorial with flying colours (thus finishing early and getting to go see Bones), he annoyed Uhura, won the bout between him and Dawson (or Cupcake as Jim affectionately called him) in self-defence class, had all his work done for the next classes, his essays were in, and it was a wonderful sunny day. The only thing that could make it better, he mused as he bought an ice-cream and continued towards Bones’ apartment, would be for me and Bones to have sex tonight.

Opening Bones’ door, he wandered through to the couch, flopping down and removing his boots and cadet jacket, before collapsing back and stretching the length of the couch.

 “Computer, play playlist number five” he called out, and classical music drifted through the apartment quietly. Soothed by the gentle sounds, Jim let himself drift off into a peaceful doze, whiling away the hours. He was currently dreaming of sailing on a boat, rocking gently in the brilliant blue water of Hawaii, when a cup of water splashed on his face.

 

“What the fuck!” Jim spluttered, jerking awake violently as Bones sniggered from the other side of the room, and the cup of water was followed by Bones’ jacket hitting Jim in his stomach.

 

“You bastard!”

 

“I’m sorry, who was the one who decided to embarrass me in front of the head of Starfleet Medical? Oh yeh, that’d be you” Bones replied, heading through to the bathroom, groaning as he went.

 “God my back is KILLING me after today, I can’t remember the last time I spent so long bent over an operating table” he called through, and Jim could hear the sounds of clothing hitting the floor shortly followed by the sound of the shower starting up.

As Bones continued ranting about the idiots who decided that scrambling the atoms of the human body was an efficient and safe way to travel, Jim looked through at the bed, and grinned evilly. Looked like he and Bones were going to be able to have sex today …

 He tiptoed around Bones’ room, picking up his clothes and placing them in the laundry basket, setting out little lights, making Bones’ bed, getting out a small bottle of lavender oil, and setting the music system onto quiet soothing music. Eventually, he heard the shower turn off, and sure enough, Bones came wandering through with his towel wrapped loosely around his hips, scrubbing at his hair with another. He looked up, and stopped dead. Jim grinned from his position on the bed, and patted the space next to him invitingly.

 

“Jim … I ache all over, I’ve had to put up with Mrs Spancill, Admiral Sellick popping into my office every five minutes after I left just to snigger at me, and I still have a pile of PADDs which need filled out by tomorrow afternoon -”

 

“Bones.”

 

Bones looked up, and Jim smiled.

 

“I know … look, I know a way that’ll make all your troubles go away. Come on, lie down and trust me.”

 

And the eyebrow strikes again …

 

“Trust me? Jim, whenever you use those words, I end up dragged along in a damn-fool idea, or dealing with the aftermath. Besides, I hardly think sex is going to help take away my back-ache.”

 

“I wasn’t suggesting sex.”

 

Jim took a moment to marvel at the jaw-drop Bones was currently displaying, as he stepped forward and gave Bones a hug. Looking up, he smiled again.

 

“I was going to give you a back-massage Bones, unless you want to lie in pain …”

 

The eyebrow stayed raised for a full five seconds, and then Bones dropped his head so that his fore-head and Jim’s touched. He sighed deeply, and looked into Jim’s eyes, kissing him softly on the lips.

 

“Jim, sometimes, you do actually display a brain. Thanks, I’d love a massage.”

 

Jim kissed him back, and manoeuvred them both to the bed, letting Bones stretch out on the bed, pillowing his head on his arms. Jim clambered up next to him, taking a moment to admire the long, smooth lines of Bones’ body as he got the lavender oil, and straddled Bones’ ass. Rubbing a small bit of oil on his hands, he reached down, and the first swipe of hands across the tops of Bones’ shoulders caused a heartfelt moan of relief to escape Bones.

            Jim stiffened, before continuing to massage away the aches and pains in Bones’ back, accompanied by Bones’ delighted groans and breathy sighs of happiness as he snuggled deeper into the mattress, letting Jim work his magic. Jim ran his hands down Bones sides as he grew closer and closer to the small of his back, kneading away the knots, barely noticing that Bones had made no sounds apart from deep contented breaths, until he brushed against the dip in his back, and got no reaction. Hmmm … normally that would cause Bones to growl, or jerk up, or hitch his breath … Jim’s eyes narrowed, and he finished up the massage, wiping his hands on Bones’ towel which was still round his waist. He leaned over to check whether Bones was still there, and huffed. Bones had fallen asleep.

For fuck’s sake, we were going to have sex tonight! Why is my life so shit! Jim wanted to say, except Bones snuffled in his sleep, and smiled a small soft smile, breaking Jim’s heart in pieces. Sighing again, Jim got up, removed Bones’ towel and put it in the washing basket. He took a moment to appreciate the sight of naked Bones, before he pulled the covers out from under him and draped them over.

Jim looked again, running a hand softly over the wild hair and soft features, letting Bones’ eyelashes flutter against the edge of his hand as he paused by his temple, and was about to pull away, when Bones reached out a hand and grasped Jim’s. A small growl escaped those lips that made everyone think about kissing them, and Bones curled up holding Jim’s hand to his chest, smiling again.

            “Fuck … Bones …” was said into the quiet room, mingling with the soft breaths and music that still played as Jim run his free hand through his hair. Not that he didn’t mind the fact that Bones was attached to his hand, but … that would mean staying … Jim didn’t stay …

 

He took one more look at his sleeping best friend, and groaned in defeat, carefully clambering into bed next to Bones, kissing his temples softly as he settled down.

 

“I think I’m in love with you Leonard …” was whispered into the quiet.



Next Part: Jim beats the test, and decides some celebration is in order ...